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i want to have sex, but i’m VERY self-conciouse about my body. how do i get over that?

It all depends on how self-conscious you are. Many, maybe even most, teens — and many adults — are embarrassed about their bodies in one way or another. Some find it hard to let their bodies be seen in public or in private. Locker rooms and swimming pools, let alone sexually-charged situations, can be pretty scary for the self-conscious.

Most people get over their self-conscious fears by pushing themselves to behave as though they don’t have them. So if you can, take a deep breath and take whatever opportunities you have to let yourself be seen in a bathing suit, gym clothes, or anything else short of full-body armor. Just getting used to being seen helps many people gain comfort.

If this isn’t something you can do on your own, you might try talking about your feelings with your parents or another trusted adult, such as an older sibling. If things are truly scary for you, a professional counselor could be very helpful.

It’s also important to communicate with a romantic partner, if you have one, about your feelings about your body. In order for relationships to have value, there must be good communication and honesty. A partner can help put your insecurities in a more realistic perspective. And you never know — your partner may have insecurities to talk about with you.

While having a healthy sexual relationship with a partner you trust can help you feel better about your body, it’s probably not a good idea to try to have sex just to prove something to yourself. That could turn out to be a very disappointing for you and your partner. Getting more comfortable with yourself first is a much better place to start.

Tags: body image, sex