Jaslene Gonzalez, 21, is living the dream: As a winner of America's Next Top Model, she's represented by a well-known modeling agency and has a contract with Cover Girl. But what you may not know is that Jaslene is also a survivor of relationship abuse.
Model Citizen
Healthy and happy relationships help us feel better about ourselves and our place in the world. Unhealthy relationships can make us feel unhappy, unsafe, and fearful of the future. Unfortunately, many young people — like Jaslene — are or have been in hurtful, unsafe, or violent relationships. It is believed that between 25-40 percent of teens have been in a violent relationship.
Abuse is not just physical — it can be verbal and emotional, and can hurt just as much. Jaslene was in an abusive relationship that lasted four years. "First there was verbal abuse, then physical, then mental . . . it wasn't a one time incident, but a pattern," Jaslene says.
Now the model/activist is lending her fame to loveisrespect.org, the National Teen Dating Abuse Helpline. loveisrespect.org provides resources for teens, their families, friends — anyone who is concerned about dating abuse and wants to learn more.
Know Your Rights
The Teen Dating Bill of Rights is a pledge that reminds teens that they have the right to be treated with respect, and that relationships should be loving and healthy. Teens can digitally sign the bill of rights and also share it with others. There's even an opportunity for teens to make their own statement about dating abuse by uploading a video and entering it in the loveisrespect.org video contest.
Dating Abuse and Your Health
Abusive relationships can put a serious strain on teens' overall health. A U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) study found that teens who experience violence in their relationships are more likely to consider suicide. Teens who experience physical violence while dating are also likely to engage in dangerous dieting behaviors, and use alcohol or other drugs.
Dating abuse affects teens regardless of age, location, or financial status. One in three teens experiences an abusive relationship, and 40 percent of teen girls know someone who has been hit or beaten by someone they're dating.
Less than 25 percent of teens talk about dating abuse with their parents, however. So where can teens learn how to prevent dating abuse? Jaslene thinks education is a great place to start. "If teens learn about it in school, it can make a huge difference in their relationships and lives," she says.
Getting Help
Abuse can damage self-esteem, and until you genuinely believe you deserve better, it can be difficult to break out of the cycle. It's not always easy to leave a relationship — even one that's hurtful. "I would find myself going back, hoping and thinking that things would change," Jaslene says.
If you're in an abusive relationship and you're finding it hard to end it — or you worry that you may be in danger if you end it — it's very important to find support. Call the National Teen Dating Abuse Helpline at 1-866-331-9474 or visit loveisrespect.org .
Planned Parenthood health centers across the country are also working to combat teen dating abuse. Find out what your local Planned Parenthood health center is doing about teen dating violence.
